Running

I think July and August must have been some of the toughest month I've been through this year. Work was tough. Ministry work was more taxing. Liping's mom was hospitalized. Something seems to be happening everyday.

So, I guess it's understandable that I may feel a little down on some days. Today, for some reason, is one of 'those'.

I feel as though, the challenges and changes never ends. I wished I had taken the path more often travelled so that things look more... stable? I wished I had simple solutions to do to solve the problems I am facing, I wish, I wish.... (when you wish upon the star..... ) I scream ," why is life so difficult?!"

I'm sure the reader of this have gone through your own fare share of bad time.

For me however, when things look so gloom, all I can do is hang on to His promises. Rather, all I can do is almost hang on to His promises and pray that His promises hangs on to me.

Consider it pure joy when you face trials of many kinds. Because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that yuo may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

Some part of me screams: 'yeah right!', the rest simply echoes with fear and confusion inside my little head. Doubts cloud my thoughts and my heart simmers with anxiety.

Somehow somewhere, deep inside, a little tiny whinny voice, with such authority, such clarity tells me to hang on. It's not even a word. When that voice is squeezed between thoughts of doubts I calm down just enough to remember the great and mighty things that He has done in my life.

I remember the first day when I believed in Him. That same still silence voice. Sweetness.

Yesterday, I was praying and memorizing scriptures and praying in tonguse while I'm running. The holy spirit just came and filled me. I wanted to give up so many times because really, my stamina is really bad... but the spirit just kept me on. Somehow my run yesterday felt like a spiritual journey, (elaborating it will take another hour for me to blog), but as i prayed and pressed on. On my 30th minute, a certain burden just lifted and I cruised on with the spirit to finish of my run. I felt great. I felt the sense of fufilment that comes from the joy when I overcome with the help of the Lord's strength. I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me.

To me, that was a valuable lesson. Life is like the run. The journey. The destination. To run the good race and keep pressing on. And through it all, surely, He is with us always.